Gay hazing

Home / gay topics / Gay hazing

I wanted to prove to myself and to others that I could handle the challenges and be an equal, regardless of my sexuality.

Turning off the main road, we entered a damp, empty single-story parking structure. This process may involve interviewing witnesses, gathering evidence, and holding hearings to determine if hazing has occurred.

Some names and identifying details have been changed to protect the privacy of individuals mentioned in this essay.

Tanner Aiello’s writing explores his experience as the first openly gay member of his college fraternity. Our three shovels were soon taken away because, according to them, our progress had slowed. You won’t be ‘the gay brother.’ You’ll be Tanner, our brother, who also happens to be gay.” Three weeks in, my pledge brothers were already becoming some of my closest friends.

“This brotherhood makes me realize what life’s all about — having a group of friends who love me.

I looked up from the pit to the rising sun and realized I had class in just a few hours.

gay hazing

You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy.

Fraternity Hazing: What to Know & What You Can Do

The vast majority of hazing incidents go unreported. I wanted to prove to myself and to others that I could handle the challenges and be an equal, regardless of my sexuality.

We were exposing our true, unfiltered selves. “Fall in line, boys,” boomed one of the pledge masters. When I signed up to rush, I was seeking the real college experience, complete with large backyard parties and drunken antics with friends. You’re one of the coolest guys I’ve met, Tanner. Dress in all black.”

My mind raced with questions.

Bring a first aid kit, five jugs of water, three shovels, and a triangular-shaped candle. You’re only as strong as your weakest link,” he said, emphasizing the need for unity in this test.

He concluded by setting our task for the night: build a huge triangular pit, 10 feet long on each side and four feet deep. It Changed Everything.”

The commentary, published recently in the Huffington Post, is written by Tanner Aiello, who describes himself as the first openly gay member of his fraternity at the University of Southern California in 2018.

Aiello recalls his pledge process as three weeks of parties and alcohol-fueled conversations about his sexuality, culminating in “Beach Night.”

Late one night, Aiello and other pledges were ordered to walk two miles in the rain to a hidden beach where, Aiello wrote, “no one would hear me screaming.”

The young men spent the next six hours digging a deep pit in the sand, with fraternity members yelling at them to dig faster or issuing punishments like running sprints or swimming in the cold ocean.

The pledges were then ordered to climb into the pit and share their deepest secrets with their new “brothers.” They took turns telling stories of drug addiction, sexual abuse, eating disorders, and other traumatic experiences.

Aiello says his story ended well with fraternity members offering him support and a sense of belonging.

The university may impose sanctions, such as probation, community service, expulsion, or suspending the fraternity or sorority.

Some forms of hazing shouldn’t wait for a formal reporting process and require immediate attention. Brothers would ask, “What was coming out like?” and “How can we better support you?” My closet door was wide open.

A brief moment of uncertainty hung in the air — and then, as if ignited by an invisible force, we sprang into motion.